July 2011
1 post
“Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun...”
– Zeus, to Hera (via historysaidwhat)
May 2011
4 posts
6 tags
Torture Toilet
From my experiences at Taiwanese theme restaurants I only have these words of advice: Don’t do it.
To elaborate: In America, I don’t think I would consider a theme restaurant. I once went to Disneyland as a child and had waffles in the shape of Mickey Mouse. Those were awesome. Our server was Belle, from Beauty and the Beast. I loved her. I was was five.
Since then I can’t...
“Just gonna stand there and watch me burn?”
– Joan of Arc (via historysaidwhat)
3 tags
Foot massage
Today I finally tried what I have been thinking of trying for months.
Maybe you’ve heard of reflexology? The long short of it is, there are points on your feet that correlate to different organs or channels of energy in your body, and if you press those points, it helps release toxins.
I’ve heard it hurts like hell, so I was afraid. Also, I’m self conscious about my feet. Or...
April 2011
3 posts
“The difficulty of literature is not to write, but to write what you mean.”
– Robert Louis Stevenson (via gabydunn)
4 tags
Chinese and English Poetry
Etemology of Love
愛
the hand
bears the covered heart
and lays it at your feet
I love you
and my most precious organ
is yours
The influence of Chinese on Modernist poetry is a topic of literary research, not a topic I have great knowledge of, but the more I learn about Chinese characters, the more obvious the influence of Mandarin over Modern and contemporary English poetry becomes.
It’s...
March 2011
4 posts
3 tags
I'm shaking
Is it a bad sign that abstaining from coffee for one day causes you a terrible case of the jitters after reintroducing caffeine to your body?
Am I GOING TO DIE?
WHAT the HELL does 7-11 put in their coffee?
I feel like a phone on vibrate and somebody won’t stop calling me.
6 tags
Enormous Corpus
Taiwan is pushing me into cross dressing.
Today I was with a friend at a Levi’s store. We asked the nice woman what was the largest size available for women (this is often the only tactic, directly ask, WILL YOUR CLOTHES FIT MY ENORMOUS CORPUS?)
The answer: 29.
My lucky number.
Usually. Not in this case. I will not post here my waist size for all to see, I will simply say that it is not...
4 tags
Mini-food Elevators
I am not exactly sure what KTV stands for. I think it is Kareoke+Television. It could also stand for AWESOME.
Kareoke in America, and I think many other countries, means a smoky bar and a lot of humiliation occasionally punctuated by a talented person who can sing very well.
Kareoke in Taiwan, and I believe Japan as well as Korea, means renting a private room for 2 hours, and the fee generally...
5 tags
Too Sweet
In March sun shines and raindrops sprinkle,
freckling the pavement grey and black,
falling softly on my lips like spare, gentle kisses.
I am too warm in my winter coat but,
tricked by the cloudless sky, I have no umbrella.
In March mosquitoes are reborn, and so my flesh.
A row of red bumps.
You learn many lessons on an island,
such as: don’t fall asleep after eating pineapples.
The juice, so...
February 2011
1 post
4 tags
“Make an effort to back to there when I am someone.”
– Taiwanese High School Student
January 2011
1 post
November 2010
3 posts
Picking boogers means love
I have noticed something.
I have noticed that in Taiwan…or, at least Taipei, the way that couples display affection in public is through grooming.
I don’t just mean brushing away the flyaway strands of hair from your beloved’s face.
I mean real, serious, grooming.
I have yet to see anyone making out on the metro, but I have seen plenty of couples picking eachother’s...
Where do you put the body?
There are a lot of freedoms we enjoy in America.
Freedom of press, freedom to be really fat, blah blah… I’m not talking about those constitutional liberties.
Today I’m going to tell you something about America you probably didn’t know.
WE CAN THROW AWAY WHATEVER THE HELL WE WANT! EVEN OTHER PEOPLE!
What I mean is that, there are very few places in America where the...
October 2010
6 posts
SCOOTER SCOOTER
TODAY I RODE A SCOOTER FOR THE FIRST TIME!
I think that to truly call yourself Taiwanese you need to ride a scooter. Taiwanese call them motorcycles, literally “mo-tow-che” but we in the states would say scooter, and I believe in England they’d say moped, and perhaps vespa in other parts of Europe…but I digress. The point is, today I rode one.
AND I WAS SCARED.
...
How I Stay In Touch with American Culture
Do you know what I love most about this picture? Aside from the fact that Tracy and Olivia look like drag queens? The random woman in the back who, apparently, actually works while these two just try to tear each other’s extensions out.
“I thought I would wear red lipstick before I ever saw Gayle at the club. And let me tell you, I would never wear red lipstick because it washes...
Well, well
I suppose I have avoided this long enough.
At the behest of my dearest bosom friend I have created a BLOG.
So, just to deliver an introduction here I have answered some frequent-yet-not-asked-yet-questions.
WHO ARE YOU?
I am a recent college graduate from a small public liberal arts school. I majored in English and Asian Studies. Before graduating I looked toward the horizon and saw a very...
